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Anne's avatar

Kristina, I, too, hated Captain Underpants. But consciously letting your child fail on the small stuff to build resilience - brilliant!! I am quite sure that will serve them better and longer than that ridiculous book! So you are ahead of the parenting game.

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Kristina Adams Waldorf, MD's avatar

Thank you. I wouldn’t say that we are ahead. Just fighting the good fight to keep structure for the teenagers.

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Curt Ghormley's avatar

“They need to fail when the stakes are low”. Brilliant!

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Kristina Adams Waldorf, MD's avatar

Thanks, Curt! He is a brilliant parent. We are still letting them fail, but they are pretty darn responsible (as they have learned that they can’t count on us to remind them about things).

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Victoria's avatar

Thanks for sharing. Very neat strategy! Your husband's as cool as a cucumber actor!

It's lovely that nature can act as your guided meditation. xo

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Kristina Adams Waldorf, MD's avatar

Yes, he (and I) are firm believers in natural consequences. The girls figure it out pretty quickly and suddenly behavior turns around.

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Patricia Washburn's avatar

I’m curious if this strategy worked with the girls. It seems like every parent has the same issues, but very different strategies to cope with it. Your husband is a saint to not get flustered knowing the girls are going to be late. I’m so impressed!! Thank you for sharing this story with us!

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Kristina Adams Waldorf, MD's avatar

Hi @Patricia Washburn! It worked - we never remind them when it is time to leave. They remind us and give us a warning - otherwise, they will be late. Chris is a very cool and relaxed parent - but he does get things done by helping them less and forcing them to do more!

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Florian Hladik's avatar

I love this story. Well told also.

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