A Blind Date

After He Said Cancer | A Memoir

“Love isn't something you find. Love is something that finds you.”  – Loretta Young

When I first saw him, I stopped on the stairs so abruptly that my foot was left suspended in mid-air. At the same time, he had been walking toward the bottom of the staircase when he looked up at me and stopped mid-stride. Our eyes met. He smiled at me for a moment, and his eyes looked so kind.

He was very tall with brown hair and light blue eyes. He was well dressed for a casual lunch date on an October day in Seattle: navy pants and a checked dress shirt that was open at the collar. I didn’t realize that he would be so handsome, I thought and blushed for a moment, looking away as quickly as I could. Struggling to regain composure, I looked back at him. He was still staring at me with those confident and expressive blue eyes.

How could I have lunch with him if I couldn’t even look at him because he was so handsome? My heart beat so hard that I could hear it, and I tightened my grip on the car keys. This was only the second date that I had been on since my divorce. Just try to appear calm, I thought descending the last few stairs to where he was standing.

“You must be Kristina,” he said and offered his hand for a handshake.

Oh, no! His voice was deep, smooth, and dreamy. I hadn’t considered the possibility that he would not only be handsome but have a voice that I could get lost in. It took me a second or two longer than I would have liked before I could respond.

“Yes, I am. So nice to meet you,” I said. He smiled again, even wider this time. I returned his smile and my heart thumped so hard, I could almost hear it. In that split second, time was meaningless.

When we met, I only knew that he was 41 years old, recently divorced and had moved to the Seattle area for a new job. A family friend suggested that we meet, as we were both single.

At first, I said ‘no’ to meeting him. I was hesitant about dating for several reasons. I had been separated from my ex for four months and was in the process of getting a divorce. The marriage had ended badly, and I didn’t think that my heart could withstand the trials and tribulations of the dating world. I really wanted to meet a nice guy, but what might happen after that would depend on his character, goodness of heart, and genuine fit with my personality and family. I wasn’t in a rush and anything short of an incredibly nice guy wasn’t worth my time.

Then, I emailed the family friend on a whim to change my answer to ‘yes’. I would meet him. What did I have to lose? It was just a lunch date. If I didn’t like him and he wasn’t a nice guy, that would be the end.

We both picked up the lunch menu when we reached the table. I couldn’t stop thinking about his eyes and deep voice. I couldn’t concentrate on the lunch menu. Not with him sitting across from me.

“Would you like a drink or a glass of wine?” the waiter asked, looking from me to him and then back to me.

“Yes, I would like a Sauvignon Blanc,” I said trying my best to seem sophisticated with my wine order. In truth, I was a novice with ordering off the wine menu. I had never fallen in love with wine. As a physician, I was often on call and couldn’t drink anyway. My savvy with ordering wine in a restaurant was less than it should have been. But saying the words “Sauvignon Blanc” seemed like the right thing to do on this blind date.

“I will have the same,” he said looking a little relieved before he glanced down again at his menu.

Perhaps he doesn’t drink much wine either and is happy that I took the lead. Maybe this was a good sign for our compatibility.

The conversation started in fits and spurts. Soon, I was peppering him with questions about himself and his life, so that I could get as much information as possible before deciding if I wanted a second date. Where had he lived and gone to college? What did he like about his job? What did he do in his spare time? What was his family like?

Listening to him, I felt comfortable. I really liked what he was saying, and the rhythm and tone of his voice. He seemed respectful of the women in his life, and me. Could it be that I would meet the genuinely nice guy that I was looking for so soon?

Maybe if we went on a second date, I would have the courage to really look at him.